July 29, 2003

A Limerick or Four

There once was a man named Tim,
From a dirty place called Michigan,
He took a wet shit,
and fell right in it,
and never washed himself again.

There once was a guy called Bill,
Who hailed from the redneck hill,
he shot up steroids,
till he got hemorrhoids,
cut 'em off and ate them from the grill.

I knew a man called Rocketjones,
With a daughter who had no cajones,
Rude comments abound,
Until Ted came around,
And broke all of my little bones.

Susie gave shelter to Paul,
Who lived in her comments; what gaul!
Bill shooed him away,
Now he's come home to stay,
In a round room with one padded wall.

Glenn was a friend who was trim,
'till he stopped going down to the gym,
he's gotten quite round,
And you can now hear the sound,
Of his ass growing large from within.

John is the host of this site,
where he posted with all of his might,
But his limericks suck,
So you don't give a fuck,
That he never got his tenses right.

Posted by John at July 29, 2003 10:08 PM | TrackBack

I hope you realize that you linked to yourself in that last limerick

Posted by: Rachael at July 29, 2003 10:55 PM

There once was a loser named John
Of whom no one was very fond
Unfunny and lame,
He coveted fame,
But delinked by all, he ended up as an Insignificant Microbe, unlinked and unloved.

OK so I suck at limericks: but you suck at everything else Collins.

Posted by: Tim the Michigander at July 29, 2003 11:03 PM

Limericks are the only form of rhyming poetry that does not suck. You're from LI, so I have to ask. Do you know who John Valby is?

Posted by: Paul at July 30, 2003 07:27 AM

Rachael - I know, but nobody else will link to me except susie so I gotta do something!

Tim - Your mother.

Paul - never heard of John Valby. who is he?

Posted by: Collins at July 30, 2003 09:17 AM

I don't know how I'm going to explain this one-but you, of all people, don't know what you're missing. I'll dig around for some of his stuff.

Posted by: Paul at July 30, 2003 09:46 AM

John Valby is a piano player that sings the filthiest songs you've ever heard. I mean filthy. If you go here:

and scroll to the bottom, there are some mp3 files. I haven't heard these, but if they are anything like the suff I have heard, you'll like it. He used to play LI a lot live. He does a lot of limericks too, again the filthiest stuff you've ever heard.

Posted by: Paul at July 30, 2003 10:04 AM

So Tim really is getting people to de-link you. *thinks* What a weenie. Granted you did insult his "Honor" So i guess that means your both weenies

Posted by: Rachael at July 30, 2003 07:45 PM

I wish everybody do his job like you do http://fragrance.smellout.com

Posted by: soap fragrances at March 17, 2005 01:57 PM

Focussing on numismatics, and commenting upon current legal and world events.

Posted by: Malefactor at May 2, 2005 05:28 AM
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